So You Want To Help - 5 Basics to help someone with a Mental Illness

Barry Pearman
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You want to help someone with a Mental Illness and need to know the basics. But what are the basics? I was in that situation, did the work, and now I share them here.

Thirty years ago I got involved in helping people with Major Mental Illnesses.

I learned some truly important lessons.

Simple lessons that I began sharing with others.

Lessons like

  • What stress is and how it affects our Mental Health

  • How to help people problem-solve.

People felt equipped to support their friends and family member.

I still write and share content about Mental Health and Spiritual Formation on my website

Topics Covered

  • Care – more than offering a scone

  • Conscious and Disciplined use of the Self – being aware of what you bring into the caring situation.

  • Empowering the Other – discovering how transformation happens through empowering others.

  • 10 ways in which Jesus empowered others.

  • Lines of Love and Respect – Boundaries but with a bit more depth

  • Problem Solving – a simple proven way in which we can help others to solve their problems.

  • Understanding Stress – checking out how stress and vulnerability affect our mental health and what can be done about it.

Images from the book


  • p.d.f.

  • Mobi

  • epub

  • 47 pages A4

  • 7000 words

  • Suggested Price $7 but Pay What You Want


5.0 out of 5 stars Insight pastors can’t afford to miss.

By Trevor H. Lund

I’m a big fan of Barry’s blog and knew the book was going to have a lot of great insight. He caught my attention by talking about pastoral care by writing:

“It will require being both the ambulance ‘Good Samaritan’ at the bottom of the cliff and a ‘fence enabler’ at the top. Let the latter be the preferred option.”

The man has the experience and the wisdom that comes with it.

I’m getting back into full-time vocational ministry and this book was timely for me. It reminded me of things I can’t afford to forget about.

Thank you Barry for sharing your insight.

5.0 out of 5 stars Very practical and balanced approach to pastoral care

By Gary Corbett

This attractively presented book on caring for and supporting others is a useful and practical resource for individuals and for groups wanting to learn more about pastoral care. Barry’s style of writing is fresh, crisp and uncluttered. Each chapter has helpful information, questions and exercises to do. He has included some very practical resources such as a process for problem-solving and setting goals. I would highly recommend this book.

5.0 out of 5 stars An easy read to a more effective helping relationship November 5, 2013

By Carolyn

“In short, practical pages, enlivened by anecdote and observation, Barry offers five simple lessons to help us help others. Putting even half of what he offers into action will prevent me from being an ‘Unguided Pastoral Missile’, and by using all of it all the time, all of us can become much more effective in ministry. If there is a defect with this book it is that it is too short. There is far, far more than Barry could say, and one senses that these few chapters are a very small spill from his sack of wisdom. But the brevity of this work can only increase its effectiveness; no-one can say they lack the half-hour it will take to engage with these insights.”

By Teresa Millan

‘So you want to help’ has been written in a very appetizing style that doesn’t take long to read and learn very useful tips from. Some of these simply require a change of attitude to one that honours, empowers and validates the identity of the person receiving help in a way that I truly see as Kingdom culture.

I find this book truly life-giving…and the great thing is that the advice given can be implemented practically immediately, without the fear of doing more harm than good! @tmf33uk

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Three versions - PDF; Mobi (Kindle); Epub


So You Want To Help - 5 Basics to help someone with a Mental Illness

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I want this!